Sometimes I wonder if I have it in me to survive... survive a tsunami, or an earthquake; to run as fast as I can to safe ground; or to do the deadman float for hours if the boat sank. I'm not sure I do. I think that if I had the option to swim, or run, or pray I wouldn't have enough guts, soul, gumption, will power or drive to live. To just live.
As the rain fell on me in California today, I wondered between bites of the Patty Melt if the water rose higher than my wheels... higher than my heels, would I fight hard enough to live. I'm not sure I would.
If I saw it coming... anything threatening; would I have the presence to call down the tide or demand obedience from the waves, or demand in a loud enough voice, "I want to live. I will live... despite you."
My shallow mind says, "No, you may take me at your will. You may do with me what you want, and I will only roll over and let you do it to me again."
Yet I did. Why is that?
It was not me who fought. Because if it was me, I'm sure my tiny small voice would say, "It feels so sweet to lay my head on this cloud and doze, so I'll stay here and lay down my bow and give my arrows to those that follow."
Yet I lived. Why is that?
Because of you, and you, and you... I live because of you.
Thank you! I'm so happy to know you. I'm so happy share breath with you. I'm grateful that you loved me, and I may stay here a while longer.
1 comment:
I want to say the same thing to you, all the time.
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