Tuesday, August 18, 2009

The Gathering

Paul, ID, August 17, 2009
3,000 people at a viewing where there are no bodies. That's a statement to the deceased. You gotta know that there are no creepy people there just to see badly made-up dead faces.

The "gathering" started at 6:00. We parked at 6:05 and I was about the 1,000th person in line. Kel, Sandy and I were reverant as we waited, and waited, and waited... in the chapel of the Paul Stake Center (they do not serve steaks at the stake center, it's a weird Mormon phrase). After about 45 minutes we reached the photo room where there were masses of photos of Jed and Jordan and Ron. We had to visit each table to see all of the photos of Jed (our designated person for which we grieved). We saw the Jed photos, and just two of Jed and Kir. They acknolowedged that Jed loves Kir, so that made the 200 mile trip worth any effort it took.

It was lovely, actually. And the three of us managed not to cry.

We stood in line behind the moto X rats, a name we gave to the women with bad hair that were either married to or slept with or followed the motor cross crowd around the moto cross circut hoping to snag a cute daredevil.

We thought we'd run into them later at the hotel and end up becoming drunken funeral friends, but it didn't happen. Thank God!

Kir was beautiful. Of course she would be nothing else but class.

And she left her station designated as the girlfriend spot at the end of the Mother > married-daughter-in-law > just-a-girlfriend line to come find us and give us a hug (before she acknowledged the moto X rats). This kid has grace, class and gratitude oozing from every very tiny pore of her being.

We are so happy to see her doing well (even if it might be drug-induced) and being her classy self.

There is just something you gotta love when the terribly grieving widow sees you, and instantly locks eye-to-eye to say THANK YOU and you feel it sear the unique pattern of humility onto the back of your brain. Kir took us by the hand to introduce us to Regina, Jed's Mother. Who was equally genuine and grateful that we came to see her sons and husband as they said good-bye to the world they know the very best.

Kirsten, you are an amazing woman with whom any sane man would mourn his loss if left without your integrity and love. Jed is with you beyond "till death do you part." I promise that he is with you for... always.

3 comments:

Stacy Q said...

Rest in peace...

Anonymous said...

thank you.
I was searching online for possible pictures of the funeral. I knew Jed through trucking and met Kirsten once. I had heard about Jeds hot girlfriend several times. My story is a bit odd. I met Jed through the trucks and some of the "trucker boys" worked for me. I also dated one of Jeds friends. I ended horribly. I felt that all the trucker boys would be on his side. He was a bit mean with the break up. Jed had me do K rail and answered questions. I didn't want to ask the trucker boys about the funeral. They are grieving and didnt want to add more pain. I have been thinking about Kirsten alot lately and had the same feeling that she did not get the same dignity as the other women. Jed adored her. The first day I met her we were playing pool. It was the first time "trucker girl" aka me was hanging with the guys as the girl with .... I was relieved to hear someone else was coming that had estrogen. jed continually checked the door till she arrived and there was that Tom Cruise kinda grin when she entered. Kirsten and I did the low down and intros and girl talk in the ladies room. So I got the quick version of Jed and her.
I asked Jed a few weeks ago if he was still with Kirsten. Again that cute lil Tom Cruise Smile came and he said yes. I explained to my friend who was with us how freaking darling she was.. he just grinned.
My heart aches for Kirsten. She doesn't have his name. In her heart and our hearts she does. She deserves the same dignity as a widow now and years to come.
tender hugs

Regirlfriend said...

Anon - I know who you are, and I'm sorry things ended poorly with the friend of the boys. I hope you have reconciled.

There will be some pictures of the funeral soon. I believe I will post some on my blog or picasa web albums.

The service was beautiful. Yes, he had that Tom Cruise grin. I still melt over it.

Thank you for your words.

Kelly, that is so sweet. I grieve like a widow without the dignity of one. I will explain more to you about that family dynamic later, and it will bring some comfort to you about the situation, hopefully.